China Trip Day 4 - Little improvements

Today we had a free day and walked to the Confucius Temple area where there were some interesting street vendors. We also took a tour with our group of a very old home that belonged to a government official. Nanjing seems to be a somewhat high economic area with many prestigious stores in the mall. We are here one more day, waiting for William's passport. Then we will fly to Guangzhou in the south where we will have our oath taking ceremony and receive his Visa. I have been so very disappointed that we didn't get to visit his orphanage. Considering how fragile he is, we just didn't feel it was a good idea to take him back there. Thankfully, we were told that he was able to say goodbye to all his friends and Nannies that morning. Sometimes returning to the orphanage brings healthy closure, but this time we just weren't sure enough to take him back. 

William is showing a little improvement each day. Today he was happier overall, smiled more, and played more. He gave me a high five and some little grins. Dan bought some toy guns and he had fun shooting. We have a long way to go, but each day shows positive changes. Last night we got him showered and into pajamas, but not without tears. He doesn't mind the shower, but hates pajamas because he has never worn them before. He took his dirty clothes and rolled them up and slept on them for a pillow. About 5am I heard some movement and realized later that he had changed back into his dirty clothes under the covers.  Tracy talked to him and he agreed to allow us to wash them and he will wear other clothes in the meantime. But tears rolled down his face as he agreed. Poor thing. So we face that tonight. It is so heartbreaking. Nighttime is extra hard for him and he sits staring by the window, doing the orphanage rock, and often has silent tears. We are grateful for everyone's prayers during this challenging time. 

“I’m not afraid to grieve. I’m afraid of what will happen to these children if no one took the risk to love them.” – Unknown

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those whose spirits are crushed. Psalm 34:18

 

China Day 3 - First Smiles

Today it was a joy to see William's first smiles. We spent the morning at the Civil Affairs Office completing paperwork. The girls were trying to connect with him and soon he warmed up. Emma's camera was his big interest, and once he got his hands on it he took a picture of his nose and thought that was hilarious. He still doesn't want Dan or me to get too close to him, although he will hold my hand when we are out in public, out of fear I suppose. The orphanage staff hid so William would not see them and think he had a chance of going back.

A couple fun stories...he is determined to press the elevator buttons each time we get on. He always knows what number to press before we tell him, 1 for lobby, 8 for the room, and 5 for the buffet. He typically gets it right. Also, yesterday he refused to brush his teeth and our guide asked him why. he explained that Dan had not given him a new toothbrush but a used one! He never saw Dan take it out of the wrapper so he assumed it was used. So tonight we took a new one out for him to open and he was fine. Also yesterday, he kept hiding from the camera as Macy would take pictures, and Tracy asked him why. He quickly stated that she doesn't look like a photographer because she is a girl!

He is still refusing to change clothes and goes into hysterics when we suggest it. He is sleeping in them as well. Seems he feels that it is all he has left to hang on to, and it's very painful to watch.

He has told our guide (crying) that he wants to buy necklaces for the nannies. He is very passionate and tender. He also begged her for an answer as to when he could return to the orphanage.  She told him he could choose to go back when he was grown up. He was very upset that he would not be able to find the way to the orphanage from the USA. 

As I watch William's response to us and how desperately he is trying to cling to his old life, I can't help but think of my own flinch reactions to God. How often it feels like God is trying to pry my hands open, and I hold on tight. In my mind I really think I know what's best, and all the while He has something so much better in store, something more than I can imagine. 

“I don’t always know where this life is going. I can’t see the end of the road, but here is the great part: Courage is not about knowing the path. It is about taking the first step. It is about Peter getting out of the boat, stepping out onto the water with complete faith that Jesus will not let him drown.” -Katie Davis

China Day 2 - William Day

This was a really tough day. William cried very hard and begged the orphanage staff not to leave him with us. He will not let us comfort him, and sat on a chair by the window for hours, just crying. He kept telling our guide about his friends that he misses and that he wants to go buy necklaces to give to the nannies. Tracy, our guide from Holt, said he is very articulate and expressive. When we got off the bus, he asked the driver to be sure to come back and pick him up and take him back to the orphanage. 

We walked to the mall and he cracked an accidental smile at me one time. He quickly recovered when he realized what he was doing. William had already told Tracy that he absolutely would not eat. She inquired about his favorite food and he said, "Coke". Papa Johns was the restaurant of choice tonight. Immediately we got him a Coke, yes me, the "no Coke mom". He allowed me to give him a few sips. Then when some spaghetti arrived I noticed an itsy glimmer of interest in his eyes. I offered him the noodles and he ate quite a few bites, just like a true Italian. At bedtime he freaked out at the idea of changing out of his clothes. He said they were gifts from the nannies. Tracy said he may want to wear them a very long time. So currently he is sound asleep in his jeans. 

We have to return to the Civil Affairs office in the morning to sign paperwork.Hopefully we can keep him from seeing the orphanage staff. We appreciate everyone's prayers for hope and healing for our littlest guy. 

On a positive note...he sure is cute and oh so 'cool'.

China Day 1

We said goodbye to big brother at the airport and had an uneventful 15 hour flight to Hong Kong, followed by a 5 hour layover and a flight to Nanjing, Jiangsu, William's province. We don't take uneventful flights for granted after Dan passed a kidney stone on the last trip home from China! 

Jiangsu is a city of 8.5 million people with many large manufacturing companies here. The Holiday Inn is very nice, and is adjacent to a large shopping mall with many American stores.  A great night's sleep made for a nice relaxing Sunday. The breakfast buffet was delicious and more food than you can imagine. Ivy enjoyed her three plates of food and bowl of noodle soup. She especially liked the congee and steamed buns. Pork dumplings were a hit with the rest of us. We ventured out on the streets and walked around the Confucius Temple area where there are a lot of street vendors. Macy is always the one that the Chinese people find most interesting because of her very fair skin. A lady stopped us and asked to take a picture with Macy, telling her how beautiful she is. (we know a few Chinese words) We get a lot of stares and quite a few laughs too, especially when we try and communicate! 

We met four other families today from our agency that will also meet their children tomorrow. We all board the van and 9:30 am and go to the Civil Affairs office for the arrival of our children at 10:00. We are all so excited and nervous to meet William.

"The Lord's lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, For His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness." Lamentations 3:22-23

Getting ready

 

We are finishing up the details before we take off on this journey to William.

 

 

 

Emotions are all over the place..stressed, nervous, and excited all in one. God has provided for every detail and need over the last ten months, and we lean on His protective care for the coming days.

 



Updated Photos

 

Friday afternoon surprise in my inbox!

 

 

 

We're goin' back to China

Introducing our newest family member...

William Asher Wen Jun



 Little Wen Jun will turn six on November 1st of this year. He has lived in an orphanage in Jiangsu, China since he was a few days old.

We received the official document from China today that states we are approved to adopt him.

We are rejoicing that there is one less orphan in the world today.

"Like cold water to a thirsty soul, so is good news from a far country."

Proverbs 25:25



Forever Family - 2 years later

We have a lot of catching up to do. Two years with Ivy is a special place to be. We are so proud of this girl. I really do love adoption, more all the time. Watching God transform a family through this process has been one of my greatest joys in this life.  I recall the pain of natural childbirth and the joy that followed. Adoption is no different. The pain is real. The joy takes longer to show up in some cases. I never want to minimize the hard part about adoption, especially older child adoption. It's just plain difficult on everyone involved. So for the people who said, "This is going to be hard". I say, "We expected hard. Some things were much easier than we anticipated, and some things were much harder."

 

Ivy has grown physically at least three years of typical growth in two years. She still finds great joy in each and every meal and snack! Imagine living the first five years of life without a full tummy, or the experience of asking mom for 'seconds'. She's still making up for those early years. Food is a real big deal to her. So she fits in well here with this group!

Emotionally, she has matured at least four years in two years time. This part is impossible to put into words. Ivy was like a two year old in many ways when we brought her home at just under five years. She was grabbing kitchen knives and was basically out of control and doing all the things toddlers do. Tantrums and meltdowns were daily or hourly occurrences. Imagine never having a 'voice'. If you cry, no one comes. So while our patience was tested, we still embraced the screams as a good sign - a sign that she realized for the first time someone was listening, and her voice mattered. Through lots of prayer and begging God for wisdom, we have found ways to validate her 'voice' and still maintain some peace in our home! God is so faithful to lead us in this journey.

 

Academically, Ivy is remarkable. She is reading and doing first grade work. Her favorite things to do are to listen to "Little House on the Prairie" books on CD, read books with mom and sisters, and do crafts of most any kind. Swimming would also be high on the list. Her vocabulary seems to have surpassed the average American child at this age. It really is remarkable. So to the people who said, "How will you teach her the language?" I say, "I really don't know how it happened, but it was much easier and faster than we ever dreamed it could be."

 

I must also mention how proud I am of the growth in our other children. The reality is they have had to make many sacrifices and changes. Watching God transform their hearts is an unexpected joy. I am so proud of them for hanging in there and allowing God to grow them. So for those who said, "This will be hard on your other children", I say, "True, hard it is. But I want my children to be challenged by the fire of adversity and to see their need to be dependent on their Savior. I want them to learn to love what God loves rather than have satisfaction in the world's things."

And for those who said, "Why would you want to do this at your age?" We say, "When God calls we must respond. This is His work. He knows what is best for us. Yes, we sometimes dream of quiet days and nights and cruising in a convertible. But the fact is, there is no where else we would rather be.



So Ivy Ruth...She's full of life, full of joy, spunk, creativity, hilarious comments, and huge emotion. She is brave and never quits at anything. She is strong-willed, never at a loss for words, and always the first to love and forgive.

So for the many people who have said, "She's so lucky!" We say,
"Trust me, We are the blessed ones."
Thank you, God, for the transforming work you have done in ALL of our lives the last two years.